doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
