But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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