You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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