i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
