he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
