I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
