Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
He? As in you personified your dick?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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