someone threw a dead crab at me
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize