I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
