remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
