It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
