You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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