so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
