White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
nutella sex= disaster
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
