from now on my penis is your penis
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
