Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
