woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
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It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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