i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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