i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
