I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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