Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
