We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
