Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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