sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize