I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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