You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
high people should be assigned attendants
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
