I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
