yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
