If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
