How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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