We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
