I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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