I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
