Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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