If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
