This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize