i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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