3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
