he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
