Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
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