Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
