Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
