If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Randomize
