My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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