my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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