is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
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