i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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