i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
