Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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