The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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